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To young Tasha,

Hello little one, how are you doing now? I am really curious because I cannot remember you much these days, but right now as always, you must be studying hard on your study table.

I have so much to say to you but truthfully what I want to do the most is to engulf you in a big, warm hug. I want to embrace your little self until the warmth melts away all your pain. I want to pat your back softly and rubs it in circle until you understand that there are people who are always here for you unconditionally in this universe. I want to whisper only sweet things in your little ears so you can finally forget the hurtful words you have heard that makes you so self-conscious even from that age. I want to caress every strand of your frizzy, curly hair and tells you that it’s imperfectly pretty. I want to hold your two small hands so tight and teach you to believe and reach out to your various dream’s constellations. I will sit beside you and hear all you want to rant about Harry Potter and its universe.

I want to take a mirror and push you to stand in front of it and make you see yourself for who you are until you believe how beautiful you are, how you are doing so well, how a precious human being you are, how you could do anything you put your mind to, how you are never a disappointment, how you deserve every single bit of love even without you having the highest position in class at year end, or being constantly an obedient child. And heck if God lets me, I would even open up your brain and remove that one speckle of trauma to protect your innocence at that time.

I don’t want to praise you for being strong little Tasha because no one at your age should know how to be strong. You should have been weak instead and still loved, you should have been stupid, but still loved, you should have been not enough, yet still loved. So, I hope you forgive me, forgive our parents and especially forgive the world for being so cruel to you by making you strong, Tasha.

I want to do so much for you little Tasha, and even now I’m always, always trying. I want to experience so much things that you used to dream of back then.

Will you be proud of me now if we meet? I imagine you would be because you understand me the most, and all of our journey to reach until this life point.

I want to promise you little Tasha that some days, this too shall pass and this pain will finally heal itself but I don’t have the courage yet to promise you that. I know how cruel the world can be so what can I promise you now is that I’m finally trying to take care of you, little one.

No matter how many times I need to, I want to shout this word until it reaches the skies and you – “I love you! I’m so proud of you! You are doing so well!”.

Take care, young Tasha!